It's not what you know, but HOW you tell it, that gets results

Couldn't resist this one:

George Phillips, an elderly man, from Meridian, Mississippi, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing his things.

He phoned the police, who asked "Is someone in your house?"

He said "No, but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me."

Then the police dispatcher said "All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available."

George said, "Okay." He hung up the phone …and counted to 30.

Then he phoned the police again.

"Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them anymore because I just shot them…" and he hung up.

Within three and a half minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, an Ambulance, a Paramedic-van and two Fire Trucks showed up at the Phillips' residence ---and caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the Policemen said to George with some irritation, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!"

George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"