What would have happened if George had been a Green Knight?
But not forgetting the Bard of Stratford today as well.
or, as Spike Milligan, once said:
Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I'll draw a sketch of thee, What kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B?
Not appropriate for today's weather, but another English tradition
At the start of Global Shakespeare, I'm sure these two will not be invited to perform twice!
Two little boys in Year 1 were chosen to be the leads in their first school play. It was in the style of William Shakespeare. The first little boy was to say: "My fair maiden, I have come to snatch a kiss and fill your soul with hope." The second little boy was to reply by saying: "Hark, a pistol shot!" Well, on opening night in the school auditorium, the teacher told them to take their places on the stage and remember to speak very loud as soon as the curtain went up. The curtain rose and looking out on the audience the two boys stood there frozen until the teacher whispered for them to begin. The first boy yelled out these unforgettable words: "My fair maiden! I have come to kiss your snatch and fill your hole with soap." The second boy screams out: "Hark! A shistol pot, a postle shiss, a pot of shit, horse shit, bull shit ... I never wanted to be in this lousy play anyway ...." The audience fell about howling – and so, no doubt, have you.
What would have happened if George had been a Green Knight?
ReplyDeleteBut not forgetting the Bard of Stratford today as well.
or, as Spike Milligan, once said:
Said Hamlet to Ophelia,
I'll draw a sketch of thee,
What kind of pencil shall I use?
2B or not 2B?
Not appropriate for today's weather, but another English tradition
At the start of Global Shakespeare, I'm sure these two will not be invited to perform twice!
Two little boys in Year 1 were chosen to be the leads in their first school play. It was in the style of William Shakespeare.
The first little boy was to say: "My fair maiden, I have come to snatch a kiss and fill your soul with hope."
The second little boy was to reply by saying: "Hark, a pistol shot!"
Well, on opening night in the school auditorium, the teacher told them to take their places on the stage and remember to speak very loud as soon as the curtain went up. The curtain rose and looking out on the audience the two boys stood there frozen until the teacher whispered for them to begin.
The first boy yelled out these unforgettable words: "My fair maiden! I have come to kiss your snatch and fill your hole with soap."
The second boy screams out: "Hark! A shistol pot, a postle shiss, a pot of shit, horse shit, bull shit ... I never wanted to be in this lousy play anyway ...."
The audience fell about howling – and so, no doubt, have you.
Ian
LMAO. Great stuff, Ian,
ReplyDeleteAnd WHERE did you find that 'Happy St Geordie's Day' card????? PMSL
Happy St Geordies Day
ReplyDeleteMorning Ian,& peeps......great joke & pics there,especially the St George card.............