Good Morning/Evening mid week humpsters,
,,,lotta rain over night ere and a deffo damp and overcast start to the day.
Back to hossy for more RT at a more reasonable time today,,1230 and no CT scan this time so hoping for a quick "In and out!" (Morning George!!)
Still awaiting pics of the "Ladies lunch"or has Photobucket banned em already??
LOL
Happy Hump day Foks,
Cheers
A five year old boy and his grandpa are sitting on the front porch together, when gramps pulls a beer out of his cooler
The little boy asks: 'Can I have a beer Grandpa?'
Grandpa replies: 'Can your pecker touch your ass?' The little boy answered : 'No Grandpa. It's just a little pecker'.
Gramps says: 'Well then, you're not man enough to have a beer'.
A little later Grandpa lights up a cigar. The little boy asks: 'Can I have a cigar Grandpa?'
Once again, Grandpa asks: 'Can your pecker touch your ass?' Once again the little boy replies, 'No, it's too little'.
Gramps replies, 'Then you're not man enough to have a cigar'.
A little later the little boy comes out of the house with milk and some cookies.
Grandpa asks, 'Hey there young feller, can I have a cookie?'
The boy asks, 'Can your pecker touch your ass?'
Gramps replies , 'Hell yes, my pecker can touch my ass'.
The little boy replies, 'Then go f**k yourself'. Grandma made these for me'. 
ha ha ha ! Morning Big Guy xx Good luck today, don't let them ugly Nurses mess around with you !! I have a pic or 2 of us Girls, but still haven't unpacked my camera....! In fact, I haven't unpacked much yet, as still 'cream crackered' !
ReplyDeleteAny word from John at all ? What have you done with him since I was away ??? C'mon, 'fess up please !
Pic of us at our lingerie shopping in Swindon on Saturday xx Have a good one people xx
Morning Elise :))
ReplyDeleteJohn hasn't been around since you left on your trip,,,"Elise withdrawal symptoms"perhaps?,,, or maybe he's just "Dog tired!!" LOL
More pics of you lingerie shopping will be greatly appreciated!! xx
Me likey lot!!
PMSL ! You are such an old sea dog at times Big Guy !! Please bring John back as wel !! Oh, just had a thought ! Do you think Val has banned him from B2PCA ??? Is it possible ?? BTW I am FURIOUS this morning......some stupid twat on PCC is scaremongering about FB.......WTF does that have to do about PCa?????? Grrrrrrrrrrr......ruffled duck here xx
ReplyDeleteMornin'All,
ReplyDeleteGood luck for a quick in-and-out today Phil. I do hope you washed your green lattice posing pouch last night!
Elise, there are lots of stupid twats around, so why worry? Always has been always will be! lol
Now, today being Wednesday, I'm about to give the ladies the hump (not A hump!) then run for cover.
Here goes:
- VERY BRAVE MAN JOKES -
1 -How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry It!
2 -What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a positive side.
3 - Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist? Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there..
4 - How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it.
5 - Why do women fake orgasms ? Because they think men care.
6 - If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong? Made her chain too long
7 - Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
8 - Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
9 - Why do men pass gas more than women? Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
10 - If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first ? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
11 - Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.. It's called a Wedding Cake.
12 - Why do men die before their wives? They want to.
Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women who don't own a gun..
errrr.....George.......You never checked with me dude......I actually DO own a Gun dude ....... ! xx
ReplyDeletePS - Laws here are different to UK. Because we are on over 2 acres of land, we are automatically granted a Gun license for pest control........Luv Ya ! xx
PMSFL !!!!!!!!!!!! No shit !!!!!!!! xx
ReplyDeleteHi Elise, so you have a gun!
ReplyDeleteSo what type of "pest" are you trying to keep down lil duck?
Hi Mike. Officially, Rabbits....unofficially, anything that comes into my land without an invite. Oh yes, forgot to say, that the law changed here last year. We can now use 'reasonable force' against tresspassers......and if they end up dead because of it, well, tough......xx
ReplyDeleteAnybody still speaking to a poor Lil' Defenceless Duck ... ??
ReplyDeleteHi all.................Elise x .....no prisoners then......!!!!!!................No Val has not taken my putor away........just been catching up on bit of TLC in the garden & Deck cleaning & staining,& e.mailing my cousins across the globe...Was out last night too.....
ReplyDeleteMike...have a good journey to the States.....Two weeks time Val & myself will be sunning our torsos in Turkey,temp at mo is similar to what we had a few days ago,(low 20's)so hoping it hots up by then...
Phil.....best wishes with the rad..........
HAhaha.....defenceless.!!.....Elise x that is until we encrouch on to your land.....LOL
Hi John, was getting worried that the Guys had done something with ya !!!! Turkey, nice, in fact, that is in the oven as we speak ! Am missing the UK heat and sunshine big time, cold and windy [hiya George xx] here !
ReplyDeleteI am defenceless John...... !!! xx
Not to rub it in.........but its another cracker here......Already had more barbies then all of last Summer....Driest April on record & heath land fires already a problem this way......Really dry weather but not complaining..
ReplyDeleteYou sound so vulnerable Elise......Who's your nearest neighbour?xx
only about 6 of us in the village John, excluding the pub of course :-)) I have a next door neighbour down the hill, very rural here, I keep saying that ! xx Its also bloody cold and windy ! :-(( xx
ReplyDeleteAt least you have a pub.!!!!.......That is mega remote.......down here we would call that a 'hamlet',rather than a village..!!.......Perhaps we should arrange a Bollockeers holiday ....somewhere hot.!!?....
ReplyDeleteVal is having lunch out today....with the girls in the office....
Need to crack on.......catch up later...x
Hope the zapping goes well Phill, you will be done to a turn by June!
ReplyDeleteJust found out my brother in law has very advanced PCa. T4 and psa 2001, not good.
Just got over Nettes mum dying 3 weeks ago after her stroke.
And to top it all I have a swollen left testicle, aparently a cyst. Anyone got a small wheelbarrow I could borrow to move my balls around in, Mike?So antibiotics no drink and stay out of the sun or I will turn bright red.
And we are of to Crete on Tuesday for a week.
Hey ho at least I wasnt looking forward to the Greek wine rubbish.
Hi Keith,
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about your B-in-L, and Nettes mum, why do such things always seem to happen at the same time?
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Bad luck about your cyst, just as you are soon to be going away.
No time to get you a wheelbarrow so best to cut it off!
I am sending my assistant to deal with it for you.
Mike.
That's terrible news Keith, hope all sorts itself out soon for you. How is your brother-in-law doing ? xx
ReplyDeleteHi Keith,Sorry to hear about your BIL,,but at least you will be able to point him in the right direction for help or advice,,,and Condolences to you Nette and family for the loss of her Mum..PLease give Nette a big hug from me and Hilary,XXX
ReplyDeleteSorry also to hear about your swollen testicle! Ouch!!!,,we had a guy at sea once who's left one swelled up to the size of a grapefruit!!,(What a load of Bollocks!),,of course he got a lot of sympathy from the lads on board!!!,Yeah right..
Seriously hope the ABs sort it out and you're ready for slipping on your Speedos by next Tuesday!!
Cheers Matey,
Sorry to hear about Nettes mum, your bil and your prob. I am sure you will get sympathy from the guys on here!! Hope you enjoy your time away.
ReplyDeletelol lunch picies yet to be censored! I could post a picture of Ian and his flake...!!
xx
Only if it's of you eating it Bev!! LOL xx
ReplyDeleteIt could be arranged!! Need to speak sweetly to him!!
ReplyDeleteGeorge, be warned revenge is being planned!!
Oh Oh George....and you thought you had problems with a Lil' Duck ! PMSL ! xx
ReplyDeleteSHOULD I BE WORRIED?
ReplyDeleteAfter all, I don't have Mike, my ex-cop, turned shovel tycoon (and part-time bodyguard to oddball burned-out musicans) to protect me now!