Good Mooning All
I love Sundays...up at 6.30am, get to an early church service, and come home feeling so 'holy'.
I love today's sermon:
SIX TRUTHS OF LIFE
1. You cannot touch all your teeth with your tongue.
2. All idiots, after reading the first 'truth', will try it.
3. The first truth is a lie.
4. You are smiling now because you're an idiot.
5. You will soon forward this to another idiot.
6. There is still a stupid smile on your face.
I don't care if you lick windows, take the special bus, or occasionally pee on yourself...
You hang in there folks, you're all friggin' special.
Morning all,,,wet and windy here(Hi George,,ya caught me in mid post creation!),,,late start after a late night,,,,Planned garden work cancelled due to rain,,,so staying indoors to play today..
ReplyDeleteHave fun whatever you're up to,
Cheers
THE TINY PIANIST
A man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and places the bag on the counter. The bartender walks up and asks what's in the bag.
The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about one foot high and sets him on the counter. He reaches back into the bag and pulls out a small piano, setting it on the counter as well. He reaches into the bag once again and pulls out a tiny piano bench, which he places in front of the piano.
The little man sits down at the piano and starts playing a beautiful piece by Mozart! 'Where on earth did you get that?' says the bartender.
The man responds by reaching into the paper bag. This time he pulls out a magic lamp. He hands it to the bartender and says: 'Here. Rub it.'
So the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a gust of smoke and a beautiful genie is standing before him. 'I will grant you one wish. Just ! one wish~~ each person is only allowed one!'
The bartender gets real excited. Without hesitating he says, 'I want a million bucks!' A few moments later, a duck walks into the bar. It is soon followed by another duck, then another. pretty soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks and they keep coming!
The bartender turns to the man and says, 'Y'know, I think your genie's a little deaf. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks.'
'Tell me about it!!' says the man, 'do you really think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?
Ahhhh. but were they female ducks who kept 'coming'?
ReplyDeleteMind you, they all look a bit 'butch' to me, LMAO
I'm saying nothing !!,,that is sooooo worthy of a tasteless, decorumless response!!! PMSL
ReplyDeleteNo taste there George...!!!!!!!...LOL
ReplyDeleteMind you i did say the 'Shag' word on another thread....so go & washy mouth out...with a good pint of Harveys bitter...see yer.....pmsl..
Your all quackers!!
ReplyDeleteGeorge, thought you'd like to know its roast lamb for tea!!!
Be good boys!
xx
Bev,,Enjoy your lamb hope it's not one of George's? xx
ReplyDeleteDavid Is To Be Returned To Italy ..
A bit of cultural news for a welcome change.
After a two year loan to the United States ,
Michelangelo's David is being returned to Italy
His Proud Sponsors were:
Like it Phil!!!
ReplyDeleteRight boys and girls I am off into unknown territory this afternoon. I am going to muck out teenage sons bedroom. I have black bin liners, gloves and a pitch fork!! Wish me luck. I may never return. Hate to think what I will find....!
Be brave Bev!!! rather you than me,,,,(Any mags you find under the bed please forward to me!!!) Many thanks xx
ReplyDeleteBev, that's got to be more dangerous than cleaning up Chernobyl.
ReplyDeleteYou are ONE BRAVE LADY!
Phil. that Michaelangelo spoof is a QUACKER! LMAO
Final fly past of Harriers over No 10 Downing street.....
ReplyDeleteSquint if ya can't read what it spells....
Hahaha.....Saw Michelangelo's David,in Florence,last Easter...If you want a cultural mini break...thats a great city to visit,& Pisa is nearby too...There must have been a young priests annual convention,at the time,as they were on every street corner lol...
ReplyDeleteWere they "Touting"for business John?LOL
ReplyDeleteCheck this vid clip out
Keep watching till the end!
Subject: Speed enforcement sign in DeKalb County
CITIZEN COMPLAINS ABOUT A RIDICULOUS SPEED SIGN!
Click on the link below!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2xnWYx8YK8&feature=player_embedded
right boys I have returned from the bedroom. Yuk, yuk amd more yuk. I knew it would be bad but not this bad. I never new you could grow so much on a pizza!!! Riot act read to him and he has to wash the plates and mugs up!!!
ReplyDeleteI have divided the mags between you all and will send off to you during the week....
You can fight over which ones you want - top gear or match or were you expecting another type!!!!!!
Hi Bev...Was a tad worried...& yes 'always expecting another type'
ReplyDeleteVery good vid Phil........This made me laugh...Val wondered if i was o.k.x
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdhM5fVtsGg
...Evening All ! A Lil' wet Duckie here dudes.....I also thought I saw Noah a little while ago ! How are we all? xx
ReplyDeletePS - Size matters ! xx
Hi Elise,Yes you look a tad damp! xx
ReplyDeleteEwwwwwwww John!! LOL
Bev,,Only footy and car mags??I am deeply disappointed ,,maybe you just havn't found his stash?
John.....that is terrible !!!!!!
ReplyDeleteCrappy vid I agree Elise !!
ReplyDeleteBTW George just texted me to say he was ofended by your comment that size matters,,,,He says "It may not be big but it's pretty!"
Maybe he will stop sulking and be on later..
Thats what he said to me too Big Guy !!! Go figure ! BTW George likes sulking far too much, he is quite a pro....PMSL !! :-) XX
ReplyDeleteNite nite boys. I have a busy week ahead as I am involved in a craft day in Norfolk om 05.03.11 to raise money for Macmillan. The women are crafting and the men are making the coffee and lunch!! I have name badges to make for the men!! Should be fun.
ReplyDeleteBe good while I am away.
George, Dolly was lovely for tea!!!! xx
Ha Ha! That will definitely spin George into a bigger sulk now ! Good luck Bev, let us know how you get on. I am on a day off from paid labour tomorrow ! xx
ReplyDeleteYeah Good luck Bev,,hope you make loads!! xx
ReplyDeleteNite as well from me Bev.x....We have a few fund raising events during March,with my local Prostate group & my fav is at our local footie club,where we ask supporters to donate into our 'prostate' bucket...
ReplyDeleteLiz (Mrs Seychelles)on PCC,is still doing the skydive,& raised much more than expected......she promised me an update on PCC of how it all went on the day ...
Elise,so sorry very muchly for the 'crap' joke....but it tickled me...!!! x
Hey i'm off too tomorrow...least i have M-I-L here to keep me company..Oh such joy..!!!
Oh by John MIL ! Sounds fun dude ! No apologies for the joke, it appealed to my Nursey side ! [don't ask !!!!!!!!] Big Balvenie is just SCREAMING my name....gotta do what I'm told eh !? xx
ReplyDeleteElise,still not able to find enough concentration levels to access 'photobucket'.....Sooner i'm off this zoly shit the better...
ReplyDeleteGot a letter back from Onco re our meeting last week..PM Yer tomorrow..Only joking about CRAP joke....Real funny & still laughing now.!!! xx
Ha Ha ! I am laughing at YOU still laughing Dude ! PM me when you get a chance. Zoly is no good for anything except PCa.....good luck xx
ReplyDeleteElise have put out a post on a thread i started three & a half months ago on PCC...Read that first & perhaps comment.!!x
ReplyDeleteOkily dokily xx
ReplyDelete