Happy Easter

/Evening Sunday Peeps,and a VERY..............................

Only Easter egg round here today is the fried one inside my bacon sandwichbut for those going to have little sticky chocolate fingers around (Morning George) have fun!!

Thunderstorm last night has cleared leaving another sunny warm day here,,,Family nosh and a few scoops on the cards this afta for the Thommo household,,,

Have a Terrific Easter Sunday all,,,,

(Hope Elise isn't suffering too much with her abscess!)xx

Cheers

WOMEN CAN BE SO INSENSITIVE ............................

Ralph returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live.

Given this prognosis, Ralph asks his wife for sex.

Naturally, she agrees, and they make love.

About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, 'Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?' Of course, the wife agrees and they do it again.

Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes he now has only 8 hours left.

He touches his wife's shoulder and asks, 'Honey, please - just one more time before I die ?'

She says, 'Of course, dear.' And they make love for the third time.

After this session, the wife rolls over & falls asleep. Ralph, however, worried about his impending death, tosses & turns until he's down to 4 more hours.

He taps his wife, who rouses. 'Honey , I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could....?'

At this point the wife rolls over and says, 'Listen Ralph, I have to get up in the morning... you don't.

 

 

George is such a Saint! ?

Good Morning Saturday Peeps,,and a VERY..................... 

 

Not sure if himself will be whipping out his lance and be tilting at dragons today but hope he's over the "Man flu"and doesn't do anything"Rash"on this fine sunny day.(Hope Elise's suggested ministrations worked Matey and da rash has gone!!)

Nice to see our Ladies enjoying a natter online in "Girls aloud"or "The hen house"as we call it!! LOL

More fun in the sun this afta,although I must check what sun oil Hilary did my back with yesterday,,,,,,,,,as I started to "Cook"in the sun I smelt suspiciously like a rasher of bacon and the 4 dogs sat around my hammock seemed to agree!!

Easter cancelled,,Da Easter Bunny is dead?? :((

Have fun Folks

Cheers

I have a headache!.......

The husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed when his wife complained, as usual,

"I have a headache."

"Perfect," her husband said. "I was just in the bathroom powdering my dick with aspirin. You can take it orally or as a suppository, it's up to you!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Good Friday ?

Happy Good Friday Bollockeers xx

Although, I dunno what's 'Good' about it today? Okay, okay, well, I am not at work, so that's good. It is also raining in The Rebel County, so that is definitely NOT good. BUT, and it's a big 'un [as opposed to mine, which isn't, Morning George ! xx] I am here to annoy the c**p outta all of you today ! My last chance for 6 days, so suck it up !

Thought you would all like to see Big Guy's "Pussy Swinging"....It takes all sorts....!!

Hope that you all have a really fab' Easter Weekend, and that the sun is shining on each and every one of you XX

And remember, if you can't be good, then be REALLY, REALLY Wicked !! LMAO !

Later Dudes
xx

Thursday supplies

Good Morning/Evening Thursday Peeps,Nice sunny morning and looks set to last ALL over the Easter Bank Holiday,....Heading out for supplies as I feel the need to make fire and eat meat!!,,a barbecue will suffice over the weekend sometime.

Wish I'd cleaned it after last time now,,when was that last burst of hot weather 2001??

Grab those rays while you can Folks and have a cracking Thursday!

 

Cheers

A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's sex?"

 Her father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse, sperms and eggs. He goes on to tell her about puberty, menstruation, erections, wet-dreams...and he thinks, what the hell, and goes on to tell her the works. He covers a wide and varied assortment of sub topics and by the time he's finished, his daughter is somewhat awestruck with this sudden influx of bizarre new knowledge. Her father finally asks:..................

 "So what did you want to know about sex for?" "Oh, mommy said to tell you lunch would be ready in a couple of secs..."

 

Hump day hotties...

Good Morning/Evening fellow Humpsters,,,,Nuther' warm and sunny day here ,,hope George's "Man Flu"improves and he manages  to totter outside and get some Vit C on his bod today!!,,(I think he took his thermals off way to early this year!!)

Short tootle to the coast for me  to aquire some crabs to assuage Hilary's mointhly craving!

May grab an ice cream and admire the scenery on the beach while I'm there!!(Check out the famed "Redcar bikini babes)..................

 

My application to be a ball boy at Wimbledon this year seems to have fallen on deaf ears!!(Again! LOL).................

 

Enjoy the weather while you can Folks and have a cracking day!!

Cheers

Lovejuice

A 12 year boy says to his dad, Dad can I get a plasma screen with Sky telly in my bedroom for my birthday. The dad says it's very expensive, but he'll see....

 On his birthday the wee boy runs home from school and up to his room, and there on the wall is the big plasma screen with Sky plumbed in, so he settles down to watch his new telly. Later on he comes down to the living room, where his mum and dad are sitting, and he asks his dad, Dad what's lovejuice? well his mum has a hairy fit, bursts into tears and runs into the kitchen.

His dad keeps his cool and says, sit down son, I better explain about the facts of life. So he explains about sex, females bodies, masturbation, and all sorts of sexual information. Listening to all this sexual stuff the wee boys jaw just about hits the deck, the dad seeing this then says, son just what programme were you watching up in your room, and the wee boy says.................. WIMBLEDON!