Tuesday grey

Good Morning/Evening Tuesday Peeps,,,,forecasted snow hasn't materialised here,just drizzle making for a grey start to the day,,

Hilary back to work leaving me to play with my Christmas toys

Gemma heading back down sarf to Brighton,and for once the roads don't look too bad...

Enjoy your day whatever you're up to,

Cheers

George the Dragon Slayer.................

Once upon a time lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts. George the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them, but he had to try.

One day George revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, the King's chief doctor.

Horatio thought about this and said that he could arrange for George to more than satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause, George readily agreed to the scheme.

The next day, Horatio made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.

Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that, among all of the citizens of the kingdom, only the saliva of George would work as the antidote to cure the itch.

The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned George to their chambers. Horatio then slipped George the antidote for the itching powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, George worked passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and George left satisfied and hailed as a hero.

Upon returning to his chamber, George found Horatio demanding his payment of 1000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, George couldn't have cared less knowing that Horatio could never report this matter to the King and with a laugh told him to get lost.

The next day, Horatio slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned George....

The moral of the story ------------ - Pay your bills.

Monday Happy !

Gooooooood Morning Dudes & Dudettes ! Hoping that all you lovely Bollockeers have survived Christmas without too much over indulgence.

Thanks to George & Phil for keeping the shop open over the holidays - What a pair of STARS !!!

All going well in this neck of the woods. Happy to report that a GREAT Christmas was had by us all AND THE BEST THING ?? All that 'orrible white stuff now gone !!!!

Have a great Monday people...time to get it all in gear again for the HOGMANAY CELEBRATIONS !!

Later Dudes

XX

Boxing day...

Good Morning/Evening Chums and Chumettes and a very....

Hope you had a jolly Chrimbo day and are set for a rematch today!

Have fun,

Cheers!

 

Chrimbo day ! :))

Good Morning Festive Peeps and,,,,,,,

Hilary warming the mince pies and quaffing a Bucks fizz while I'm waking myself up with a Newky Brown,

Have a Grrrrreat Christmas day!!!

Cheers!!

Happy Christams Eve..

Good Morning/Evening my festive Bollockeers and a Very Happy Christmas Eve,,Sorta crept up Huh?

Gemma made it back from Canada and landed at 6am now heading our way with Dad's pressies

No doubt Hilary will be rushing round like a blue ars**d fly today but I'll be taking refuge in the kitchenwhipping up a Chinese nosh for tonite

Enjoy your Christmas Eve and have a Fffffab Christmas!!! 

 

Cheers

Prince Charles decided to take up jogging. Every day, he'd jog past a hooker standing on the same street corner. He learned to brace himself as he approached her for what was almost certain to follow. 'One hundred and fifty pounds!' she'd shout from the curb. 'No! Five pounds!' He would fire back, just to shut her up. This ritual between him and the hooker became a daily occurrence. He'd run by and she'd yell, 'One hundred and Fifty pounds! ' He'd yell back, 'Five pounds!' One day, Camilla decided that she wanted to accompany her 'husband' on his jog. As the jogging couple neared the working woman's street corner, Prince Charles realised she'd bark her £150 offer and Camilla would wonder what he'd really been doing on all his past outings. He figured he'd better have a good explanation for his Wife. As they jogged into the turn that would take them past the corner, he became even more apprehensive than usual. Sure enough, there was the hooker. He tried to avoid the prostitute's eyes as she watched the pair jogged past. Then, from her corner, the hooker yelled: 'See what you get for five pounds, you tight bastard?!'