TUESDAY: Titter Ye Not!

   Mornin'All.

A text from 'Furious Phil' an hour ago:

 

'Fu*king Noisy Ba*tar*ds in here...and they moved me to another ward at 4.40am FFS!!'

WTG Phil...Get MAD and GET HOME!!

 

More news as and when Phil hears it himself.

 

Tuesday Sun in The Rebel County

Good morning Bollockeers. Sunny day for me for a change !

Had a text from Big Guy last night. He said he was comfortable and has loads of Nurses waiting on him hand and foot [grrrrrrrrrr! ] Also, they very kindly hooked him up to a Balvenie drip, [no ice] and he was going to have to 'put up with what he is told !'

Hang in there Big Guy, you will be sprung soon ! George and Topgun are working on a plan !!

Hope you have a good day people xx

Loads of these for Big Guy today XXXXXXXXXXXX

Monday Night: Wassup with our PHIL?

Dear All,

 

Just had a very quick call from Phil. He'd only been home a short while after having blood tests done when the hospital rang him to say 'Pack a bag and get back here now'.

 

Apparently there is some problem with a kidney. Phil has absolutely no idea what the trouble is.

 

Until I hear again from him later tonight (I hope) we'll all be in the dark about this one.

Please bear with me...I will post here the minute I have any news,

 

A worrying time for him both Phil and Hilary.

Praying it's nothing too serious.

 

 

George

Damp and windy...

Hi Ex Weekenders,,hope it was a Good un' for y'all,,,Damp and windy(Morning George) to start to the day here,,as Bev and Ian get set to head off for some Spanish sun this week,,,,Have fun "Da Bevian!"

 

Her Ladyship off for a coupla days and still enjoying a lie in,so let well alone and hope I escape any "S"word pursuits!(Unlikely I know LOL)

Good luck with appoints this week Peeps I know there are a few on the cards, ................

Cheers

 

 

Mick Hucknall has been arrested after being caught shaggingg a rabbit,,,

.

A police source said he was holding back the ears and singing "bunny's too tight to mention".
__________________

Sunday brisk,,

Good Morning/Evening Sunday lurkers,.....Plenty thunder, lightning and rain yesterday pm in this neck of the woods,,,,,now bright and very breezy(Morning George)

Bev and Ian off for some well deserved sun later in the week and Bev has agreed to leave me the keys to her "Craft"room....for us boys and girls to pop in and express our "Artistic bent!"....(mixed sessions will be Midnight till 6am,,, please bring a bottle and a bean bag and any resusc meds that may be necessary)

Enjoy a chilled Sunday Bollockeers,,

Cheers

A man moves into a nudist colony.....

 He receives a letter from his grandmother asking him to send her a current photo of himself in his new location. Too embarrassed to let her know that he lives in a nudist colony, he cuts a photo in half and mails it. The next day he discovers that he had accidentally sent the bottom half of the photo. He's really worried but then remembers how bad his grandmother's eyesight is, and hopes she won't notice.

 A few weeks later, he receives a letter from his grandmother, It says: "Thank you for the picture. Change your hairstyle... it makes your nose look too short.Love,Grandma"

Larry Is In The Hospital . . . .....

Who in the hell is Larry?
 

Well Larry is the guy who gets home late one night and Linda, his wife, says "Where the hell have you been?" Larry replies "I was out getting a tattoo!"

"A tattoo"? She frowned.  "What kind of tattoo did you get?"

I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates" he said proudly.

"What the hell were you thinking"? She said, shaking her head in disgust.  "Why on earth would a Chartered Accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"

"Well, 1:     I like to watch my money grow.

             2:     once in a while I like to play with my money.

             3:     I like how money feels in my hand.

And, lastly, instead  of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred  bucks anytime you want."

Larry is in the Royal Adelaide Hospital, Critical Care Unit, Room 233

Fridaaaaaaay fiiiine....

Good Morning/Evening Friday Folks,and a very pleasant start to the day too with blue skies and sunshine up ere'

R and R for Philip today while Hilary cracks the whip at work!,,(morning Bev,,where is the Bevian????)

Enjoy yoiur Friday and hope your wekend is shaping up to be a cracker!!..

Here ya go John,,( I thought it was a cute ass yesterday! )LOL..............

An Alabama preacher said to his congregation, 'Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian Family.' No one moved. The preacher continued, Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression.'

Again all was quiet. Then slowly, a drop dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, 'Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan.

I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a "wizard under the sheets." The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared!